Jitters

In 27 hours I will be standing in the bridal salon waiting to see it. Holding my breath in anticipation and praying to the heavens that it fits. My first dress visitation is tomorrow and to say I'm nervous is an understatement. I love my dress, its beautiful and original and it has character. Is it what I thought I would be wearing on my wedding day? No.

I've had serious serious doubts that it is "the" dress and the only comfort I could find was telling myself that I had no control over the situation until the dress came in and I tried it on. Then, and only then, I would have enough ammo to say "i do" or "do not". Well, that day is tomorrow. So all the nerves I've suppressed for the last 5 months trying to figure out if I ordered the right dress are bubbling to the surface.

I can't give away too many details because KJ reads my blog regularly, but I can tell you this, the cut is not supposed to be flattering for my body type, the material is not what I thought I wanted, and it's hella hard to find accessories to go with this dress. But when I put it on in the store, I lit up. The dress was fun.

Right now, I expect to love the dress like I did when I ordered it, but I do expect to be majorly critical. I tried on a sample size that was too small for me, so this will be the first time the dress actually is "on". Being a fit that I wasn't expecting I've actually talked to my mom about what will be the "deal breakers" with the dress. Never mind if the dress is fun, if its unflattering then more dress shopping we will do.

I'm not sure I feel like a bride, and that scares the beejeebies out of me. We've all seen episodes of SYTTD with those "YES" moments, where they put on the dress and its like magic. They are a bride, and they all of their wedding issues are solved because they found THE dress. That was NOT my experience. A trip to Kleinfelds that ended in notta, trying on some 50 dresses at 2 other stores, a trip to this bridal salon with 20 other dresses, and after taking 3 days to weigh my decision heavily and a second visit to make a final decision, I placed my order. Much thought went into this purchase, there was no impulsiveness about it, after all it was a business transaction. Ordering the dress was my first act as a bride. Maybe with all my planning and really being in the thick of things I'll feel more like a bride now?

Did anybody have that wedding relization of I'm A Bride at an unusual point in the planning process?

Sigh... wish me good luck!